Chire's Merry Happy Unbirthday
by darkwater567
Summary: Okay it'll pry be an unhappy birthday once she reads what i got but hey, I tried. Honost I did But at least there is 364 unbirthdays out there and only 1 birthday! M for Mature because only a mature mind won't implode upon reading this
1. Some people shouldn't be authors

"Damnit." The author of this story cursed as she shuffled through her millions of miles of paper. Course the day She was suppost to have this posted for her friends birthday, she lost her psychology notes, which had doodles and the beginning of the story on it. It was only three paragraphs of the beginning but those three mattered! Something's just aren't meant to be, the author mused in her head. After all it's only been over a year and a half later since Her friend requested a story from her, one she still had on her computer but considered it dribble drabble. The author sighed, And mused again that maybe it was just the wrong beginning, maybe, just maybe she should start over...  
"Bah humbug." Said the cat, who you can imagine wasn't fat at all and it was indeed as you guessed it, black. The author ran off to find something sweet to eat, hoping to find a beginning of a story along the way. But alas!! It was not to be again for the only thing the author could find was a red apple! A very small bruised apple at that. It would have to do. The author reseated herself.

"Just think romance. Just think romance. The poor girl asked you over three weeks ago and all you've come up with is dribble so far! She deserves better then that! I know your the most deathliest person out there, but you can make it work, after all if you look at Romeo and Juliet there was plenty of death there." Said the author's muse.  
"Yeah right, two emo's killing themselves because they love each other so much...right..." The author responded to her muse while looking at the apple for inspiration.

"Well it was one of the most inspiring love stories of all time, and they make you read it today so it must have importance!" The apple said in an attempt to justify the muses statement. The author ended up staring at the apple for a very long time. There had been no movement and the apple certainly had no eyes or mouth, so how did it talk? The author took an inward sigh knowing that she can't drag this out much longer. It was her duty as a friend to come up with something, and she only had 5 hours and 56 minutes to do so before midnight. Things were not looking good.  
"Okay, okay, okay." The author said while forcing herself to the keyboard. "First we need-"The author didn't get much farther because her gut said it would be dribble anyways. Maybe if she put all the dribble stories she made together and posted that, no one would notice.....Nah. The author stabbed the apple with a nearby mechanical pencil and threw it at the muse. The muse therefore died from being crushed because he had only been about 2 centimeters big and wasn't able to dodge in time. It's too bad i can't have Hamlet's help, the author thought, he doesn't believe in love. 5 hours and 51 minutes left. Just, start, the author told herself and then entered down to put a title, one of which didn't matter the plot or storyline, it would remain the title no matter what.

**Chire's Happy Merry Unbirthday**

**By: A very pessimistic author**

~*~Asbestos kills. Wait. Breathing asbestos kills.**Breathing kills.**** ~*~**

**This is the point where the author tried a serious attempt at writing the beginning but found she just wanted to make pizza more, and so she ran off to do so. Only 5 hours and forty minutes left.**_ "I Know! I Know!" _**The author exclaimed while quickly making her way back to wait/write while the oven was preheating. She shook her fist at the people on aim that were trying to distract her.**

The stars twinkled brightly in the neon sky above. _"No!" _**The author exclaimed. **_"That's exactly how the last one started! It shall be the day!!!!!! Normal people are out during the day!!!" _**The author said still defiant to the good beginning. Ahem. 5 hours and 25 minutes left. The author gave the small apple to her little baby neice. After taking the pencial out, and brushing off the muse of course.**

It was a nice fall day. The leaves where piled high among the sides of peoples lawns. A warm breeze flew down the street carrying some leaves away to their destiny. Which was probably rotting in the ground, only just someplace else off in the distance. Nay! One leaf strayed away from the pack and rolled to a stop upon the sidewalk. The leaf seemed happy and content on it's new quiet and uncrowded resting place. That is until a sneaker stepped and crumbled it into a million tiny pieces.

**The author had trouble writing after this because the cat, the same black cat as before placed itself into the author's lab and placed both paws/legs over the author's right hand. The dominant hand.**

**"Bah, Humbug." The cat said again. "You may only write more if you feed me and the other cats!" And so the author went on a wondrous adventure of her own, in to the dreaded deep confines of the garage. The floor was dark and cluttered. To the somber mind it was as if death's touch was there itself in the form of coldness. The Author grabbed up a bowl of dry cat food and placed it in the kitchen for all the cats to eat at their own time. Upon her return she had noticed the oven only had 3 minutes left, in which case she waited. Afterwards she brought a purple balloon, three dogs, one which was fashionable late, and the pizza back with her to the computer desk**_. "Okay"_** said the author, no more fooling around!**

**Thus, ironically the author goofed off until there was only 5 hours left. The author hissed as she was made to be sit down and focus on her story. "You know if you spent have the time you do goofing off and actually writing the story you would have had enough of it to post right now! but instead what do you have? A paragraph. How disgraceful. Your a horrible friend!" said Hamlet, the author's ghost friend. The author feel as if her gut just took a deep blow and flinched at the remark. The author cried and vowed that she wouldn't stop writing until it was good from now on.**

The sneaker was attached and belonged to Sora. Yes The Sora. The one that fought of Xehanhort's heartless, Maleficent, and Organization XIII. Wonderful boy, but quite naive and sometimes really, really stupid. You know the one? The one with the brown spikey hair and the keyblade. Yeah, rings a bell now doesn't it? Don't answer that. Said boy was making his way to the docks. Him, Kairi, and Riku were all going to the island today to examine all the overgrowth damage there was from them not being around to take care of it for 3 years. Man that was hard to believe, Sora thought while placing both hands behind his head and looking up to the baby blue sky. Not a single cloud. Next thing he knew , Sora found himself tripping over something and landing face first onto the pavement. Laughter emitted from the air behind him.  
"You've spent three years fighting constantly against the heartless, and you still can't find your balance?" Riku said coldly.  
"I don't know what your talking about." Sora said as dignified as he could while pulling himself up.

"Yeah, Riku, you must be seeing things." Kairi said jokingly while elbowing Riku lightly. "You okay Sora?"  
"Heh, Yeah course." He rubbed the back of his head and smiled kindly at her.  
"Are we going or what?" Riku said while continuing to walk down the sidewalk. Sora turned to follow but Kairi stopped him. She hugged him from behind and looked up at him. One of her hands moved to his forehead.  
"Your bleeding." It took Sora a moment to register, and subconsciously he reached up and sure enough there was a little blood. He wiped it away, as Kairi moved to stand in front of him.  
"Don't worry I'm fine. I've had harder hits then that before." He said reassuringly. Sora took her hand and continued upon their path.

** ~*~3~*~La De Da~*~3~*~  
And thus the author of this story died.**** For while she focused on writing the story she forgot to share the pizza with the three dogs and the bah humbug black cat. ****In forgetting to share the pizza, the animals then decided to kill her. ****It was gory and the Author's remains are still splattered among the walls today. ****The end.**

**To be gotten around to another day ~*~3~*~**


	2. Brainz! Brainz! It's okay!

**The author nodded to herself as she examined the surroundings about her. She had gotten rid of two of her aim friends, the oven was preheating, she had 4 hours until midnight, and everyone and their best friend was there in her living room. The author stared at the baby niece sitting on the floor. "What?" said the dog that is always fashionable late. **_"Gir."_** The author replied. **_"Oh yeah!"_ **The author said aloud while going back to the kitchen. She retrieved an apple and upon her way back her foot discovered something sharp.  
**_**"**__**Mother from hell**__**!!" **_**The author shouted as she twisted and turned to see her own foot. The author placed the apple on the table and looked down at her foot. Great, blood. She pulled out the item that decided to stab her. It turned out to be a shard of glass from the cup that had shattered the previous day with out any explanation or cause.**

**"Back away lassie, or I'll do more then stab ye foot!" The shard called out.  
**_"Such a small shard to have such a big mouth."  
_**"I'll show you to step on someone, and then call them names!" The shard said and jumped from the author's fingers. The author stared at it for a few moments. Grab it up now or leave it for an unsuspecting victim later?....That victim would be her...The author picked up the shard of glass and threw it away. **_"To the computer!" _**The author then shouted victoriously and then ran off to the living room with her apple. Jumping over the dogs and niece along the way. She seated herself within her chair as usual, and placed her fingers on the keyboard.....She waited for something to come to her....  
....**

**....**

**...**

**and waited....**

**....**

**....**

**...**

**Beep! Went the Oven saying it was done preheating. Not even a minute later the author was replacing herself into her chair.  
**_**"**__AH! What the crap?!?!" _**The author said jumping up and looking at the chair.  
"Ha! Ha! Lassie! I told you I'd teach ya a lesson!!" Said the shard, the same one that author swore she threw away. Now that she thought of it, maybe since it was possible for it to jump that it wasn't smart to leave it uncontained. The author picked it up and placed it upon the desk. "**_yeah, yeah."_** The author said quietly while rubbing her eyes.  
"What's a' matter with ya missy?"**

_"Well if you must know-" _**  
"Not you! I'm talking to the dog!" The shard said while glaring at the author. The author looked behind her to see the dog staring, and staring, and staring. The author shuttered and turned back to the computer screen. Where was they in the story? Right they being Sora, Riku, and Kairi, were walking along~ Just walking along.... Hamlet shoved the author aside and possed the keyboard.**

**If that pathetic excuse for a human writer can't think of anything or at least try on her own I may as well take over.**

It hadn't been long before the three were scrounging around Destiny Island. Riku had quickly made his way to his favorite spot. The little island away from The Island. Sora and Kairi walked hand in hand to the Secret spot, or at least the entrance of it.

**The author ran off at this point because the oven said the Pizza was done, quite literally this time and Hamlet can't trust the author alone at any point. **_"Relinquish my pizza damn you!!" _**The author said to the pan as she used a knives to unstick the pizza. "Well why didn't you just say so?" The pan replied back and suddenly instead of being on a pan the pizza was on a paper plate. The author cut the pizza into four parts and tried to take a bite. "**_Hot!! __**Hot!!!!!**_**" The author yelped as she put the pizza back on the plate. She looked up only to see Hamlet smack himself at her stupid ness. The author quickly munched on the pizza again. "**So hot, but ohhh soo good~" **The author said in delight as she made her way back into the living room. The author and hamlet had a tea party with the three dogs, one which was fashionably late, the glass shard, and the black cat that was indeed not fat, until there was 3 hours left until midnight.**

**When the author came back she scratched out what Hamlet had previously written and tried to calm her hic-ups. She took in the deepest breath she had ever taken and then like magic her hic-ups where gone! Thankfully so was all the animals and ghosts, and glass shards for awhile. Now then, lets write seriously, the author thought, lets get back to what we wrote before.**

Sora and Kairi had lost sight of Riku in no time because they walked far to slow to keep up with the fast paced silver headed boy. They didn't mind though, they liked to spend as much alone time as they could. Sora was just happy that Riku understood and wasn't going to be a jerk about anything. He smiled a Kairi, just happy to have her by his side now. He'd never take her company for granted ever again.

"Your in a merry mood today." Kairi said grinning back at Sora.  
"How can I not be? Everything is finally back to normal and your here by my side."

"You really think it's over?" She said quietly, possibly to quiet.

"Huh?" Sora said while tilting his head to the side ever so slightly. Kairi just shook her head and looked at the empty street ahead of them. Nothing moved besides the slight twittering of the leaves. Then, unsuspectingly, Destiny City's sirens went off. The sirens you hear when there is a tornado or emergency. The two looked at each other frowning. They both stopped. Sora couldn't help but glance around.  
"They are probably just testing it," Sora said trying to convince himself more then Kairi.

"Yeah...There's not never a cloud in the sky." Kairi said while looking up. "Heh." The two laughed nervously before continuing on. ~*~la de da ~*~

"I can't wait to go back to the island." Sora said while they were insight of the docks. "It's like a second home, ya know?" He kept his hand entwined with hers.

"Hm." Kairi nodded. "I do."

**The author rejoiced as she had reached the end of two pages in WordPad.**

"I swear, I could have been to the Island and back by the time you two got here." Riku said while leaning against a light post. Sora laughed and let go of Kairi's hand.

"Sorry, just enjoying the scenery."

"Hey Riku, What do you think the siren's were about?" Kairi said while walking out onto the dock.

"Sirens?" Riku uncrossed his arms and stepped forward. "What siren's?"

"You didn't hear them?" Sora looked back at the street they came from and back at his friends. "It was the same kind that would sound if there was a natural disaster coming this way."

"You should have heard them." Kairi said at the end of the dock, not even bothering to face the two boys.

"Yeah well I didn't. You two are just trying to make me think I'm crazy or something huh?" Riku stated and walked to his boat and got in.  
"No! No joke this time honest." Sora said rubbing the back of his head.  
"Sure, Sure." Riku pushed the his boat away from the dock. "Are we going to the dock, or do you two still need some alone time?"

_"I'm proud of myself," _**Said the author. She had went a good portion of the story line without getting lost or dying.**

The three walked along the sandy beach of Destiny Island. Everything looked untouched, All was the same but only as if it had dust upon it, if that was possible for it being completely open to the elements of nature. Maybe it was just because they all hadn't seen it in forever. Too many memories. Riku stopped and looked back. Sora froze thinking at first that Riku was giving him an odd look but rather it was behind him. Sora glanced back only to see Destiny City on the horizon.  
"Something is going on." Riku said, and as if to confirm him, the sirens could be heard very lowly from the distance. A blade of lightening flashed and hit somewhere in the City. Sora felt his heart sink, knowing that it had to have been magically produced because of the cloudless sky, and the fact that heat lightening goes across the sky and doesn't actually hit land.

"Whatever it is, it can wait." Kairi said from Sora's side and continued to walk down the beach.

"But-"

"She's right, it's not like it's the heartless, I'd be able to sense them." Riku said following her lead. "Besides they would attack here first. The door to this world is here remember?" Sora stood silently before quickly making his way to the secret place entrance. He was going to check on the door just incase. After all he hadn't gotten the chance to seal it yet anyways.

"I'll be right back." Sora said calling out to his friends, and worked his way through the vines and overgrown moth blankets. The tunnel was just as he remembered, dark and gloomy. The only difference now was that he wasn't scared to go there alone, infact he preferred to do so. At least when Kairi wasn't willing to go with him.

**The Team Rocket song started playing and the author realized that she only had 2 and half hours left until midnight and might as well stop here. She had to go capture Pikachu for Giovanni anyways. Team Rocket's blasting off again!! The author dissappeared in a flash in the night sky.**

**To be continued soon.**


End file.
